We would like to welcome the newest member of the family. The Siberian Splash Beast. This new creature has been discovered living in the frigid waters off of Siberia. They were dubbed the Siberian Splash Beast due to their playful nature and desire to soak everyone in the boat. Not much is yet known about this furry sea creature, but it is believed that it is a hybrid between a Loch Ness Monster and a Sasquatch, because of the fur. These guys are quick witted and a treasure to have around.
How did we capture and relocate them to the United States so soon after their discovery? Well the truth is that these illusive creatures cannot be captured, but they can be lured and befriended with a couple of strips of bacon jerky. Yes, there is such a thing as bacon jerky, but I find it a little disturbing that this is the part of the story that you question. Whether they are swimming in the frigid water, or sunbathing on a window sill, they are said to whistle slow ballads and have a way with the ladies. Or was that Billy the Kid? Anyways don't feed them after midnight or they get very cranky. We think it is because of the jet lag, and not some silly rule given out with a to-go container of fried rice. And don't ever, and we mean ever...
How did we capture and relocate them to the United States so soon after their discovery? Well the truth is that these illusive creatures cannot be captured, but they can be lured and befriended with a couple of strips of bacon jerky. Yes, there is such a thing as bacon jerky, but I find it a little disturbing that this is the part of the story that you question. Whether they are swimming in the frigid water, or sunbathing on a window sill, they are said to whistle slow ballads and have a way with the ladies. Or was that Billy the Kid? Anyways don't feed them after midnight or they get very cranky. We think it is because of the jet lag, and not some silly rule given out with a to-go container of fried rice. And don't ever, and we mean ever...
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